x3loveme2times (12:49:59 PM): I hate you
x3loveme2times (12:50:07 PM): bye
Sunday, December 24, 2006
The Ultimate in Getting "Big"
Everyone knows that cool things that guys do are directly proportionate to how big their dicks are. Let me tell you a little story about how I can barely zip my pants.
Okay, it isn't really a story but I've got nothing better to do or say. The other day Fowler and I took an early day from school and were chillin at my place when we saw a video trying to explain a technique for ripping a phonebook in half. The guy used a little bitch ass phonebook that was probably the size of two magazines put together and ripped that shit in half. Feeling like if one were to master this promordial art that their package would suddenly inflate like a fuckin Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon I had to try it. I grabbed a (bigger) phonebook of my own. After trying to get the technique right for a little while, I ripped that shit in half like a fuckin beast. Simultaneously fireworks shot off in every direction and grafitti fell from the heavens as if Zeus himself was giving me a congratulatory pat on the ass. I rip motha fuckin phonebooks in half, bitch.
A second feat of the ages was pulled off yesterday after the super-holiday-blowout-bananza-slammin'-thumpin' dance/party thing yesterday (12/23). After getting home we decided to go for a walk since we were stone drunk. Not 30 seconds later, Pat Bailey (aka P. Blizz.) pulls up in his rig and offers a ride, more beers, and a chance to go get stereotypical by taggin' up some school shit. We meet up with Brian Sypher (aka B Syphes aka The Undertaker aka Shit that kid loves his grandma). For absolutely no reason he and Nick Solitro (aka ..Nick) start tearin up some random sign. We all start yelling and calling them pussys because theres obviously no way they're going to rip it out of the ground. As it turns out B Syphes don't play that shit and ripped it out of the ground by himself.
While I'm at it I might just throw an explanation your way as to why we call Pat, P. Blizz.(ard). Other than his completely irrational and explosive temper (purrree ice) of course. Anyway we had a field trip in Spanish to the Hospital, in which we drove our own cars. Pat drove Ben, me and Holly(?) there. On the way back to school we got in the car and left Holly behind all by herself. She caught up to the car due to traffic in the lot, and asked to get in. Ben replies "NAAAH, WERE BIZZYIN OUTTA HEA!". Much to my surprise, we really did bizzy the fuck out of there. Pat floored it, and we left Holly by herself with no way to get back to school.
Is that funny shit? Why yes, it is.
Okay, it isn't really a story but I've got nothing better to do or say. The other day Fowler and I took an early day from school and were chillin at my place when we saw a video trying to explain a technique for ripping a phonebook in half. The guy used a little bitch ass phonebook that was probably the size of two magazines put together and ripped that shit in half. Feeling like if one were to master this promordial art that their package would suddenly inflate like a fuckin Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon I had to try it. I grabbed a (bigger) phonebook of my own. After trying to get the technique right for a little while, I ripped that shit in half like a fuckin beast. Simultaneously fireworks shot off in every direction and grafitti fell from the heavens as if Zeus himself was giving me a congratulatory pat on the ass. I rip motha fuckin phonebooks in half, bitch.
A second feat of the ages was pulled off yesterday after the super-holiday-blowout-bananza-slammin'-thumpin' dance/party thing yesterday (12/23). After getting home we decided to go for a walk since we were stone drunk. Not 30 seconds later, Pat Bailey (aka P. Blizz.) pulls up in his rig and offers a ride, more beers, and a chance to go get stereotypical by taggin' up some school shit. We meet up with Brian Sypher (aka B Syphes aka The Undertaker aka Shit that kid loves his grandma). For absolutely no reason he and Nick Solitro (aka ..Nick) start tearin up some random sign. We all start yelling and calling them pussys because theres obviously no way they're going to rip it out of the ground. As it turns out B Syphes don't play that shit and ripped it out of the ground by himself.
While I'm at it I might just throw an explanation your way as to why we call Pat, P. Blizz.(ard). Other than his completely irrational and explosive temper (purrree ice) of course. Anyway we had a field trip in Spanish to the Hospital, in which we drove our own cars. Pat drove Ben, me and Holly(?) there. On the way back to school we got in the car and left Holly behind all by herself. She caught up to the car due to traffic in the lot, and asked to get in. Ben replies "NAAAH, WERE BIZZYIN OUTTA HEA!". Much to my surprise, we really did bizzy the fuck out of there. Pat floored it, and we left Holly by herself with no way to get back to school.
Is that funny shit? Why yes, it is.
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